Friday, April 24, 2009

Can I Pay To Have You Give My Sacrament Talk For Me???

It must be really awful being a Bishop. No one wants to talk to you.

If you see your Bishop coming at you in the hall you avoid eye contact for fear that he is going to ask to see you for an appointment. Of course we all know what happens in these appointments; he asks you to do something that you have no idea how to do (like teach children-lots of children- how to sing) and of course you know that you will agree to do it (I don't even know how to lead music) and then you're in that FIRE-Refiners Fire. OR-WORSE-if you make eye contact you may have to speak to him. If you start speaking to him he might remember that it's been awhile since you spoke in Sacrament Meeting!!!!! ARGH!!!! So I avoid eye contact with my Bishop at all costs.

Now if your phone rings you have caller ID, thank heaven. So if I see that it's the Bishop, I ask Jade or the kids to get the phone. That way, if it is for me I can have one of the kids give him some lame excuse-like I'm cooking dinner or running the vacuum.

Well, I let my guard down and I returned the phone call that I missed from my Bishop. I thought he probably called for Jade, but NO! He asked me to give a talk in Sacrament this Sunday. ARGH!!! See, no one wants to talk to the Bishop-how sad is that???

Good news is that I found someone who will give my talk for me Sunday and it's only going to cost me $27.77 for him to write it and another $55.55 for him to give the talk. Now if you want to hear a FUNNY/INTERESTING talk you might want to cough up $5.56 because he charges $33.33 to write a FUNNY/INTERESTING talk. It's up to you!

Want a laugh??? Check this out: http://www.myregisblog.com/

Another funny I found on this blog:

Because there's nothing more annoying than when your wife uses your hymn book.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

THIS IS A STICK-UP...OH, WAIT, MY CELL PHONE IS RINGING

Fayetteville police released this surveillance photo of a pregnant woman who tried to rob a Carter Bank & Trust branch on Tuesday.
As I ate my low-cal breakfast of Rice Pudding this morning, I read the on-line news as reported by MSNBC. I am kinda weird (for those of you who didn't already know) so I always gravitate to the "unusual" reports. I found a doosey this morning. A morsel so delicious I couldn't keep it to myself. So I am sharing it with all my readers-yes, all 3 of you!

The police in Fayetteville, N.C. are on the look out for a pregnant woman (no, not Angelia Jolie) who tried to rob a bank at gunpoint. However, she was unable to complete her attempt because her cell phone rang and instead of ignoring it, she took the call, got distracted and left the bank WITHOUT TAKING ANY MONEY! Police are on the look-out for a woman in her late 20's-early 30's, pregnant and on her cell phone.

PLEASE-if you have ANY leads contact the N.C. police at once. Help them get one more cell phone IDIOT off the streets!

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

I BROKE UP WITH MY BOYFRIEND


This is my adorable niece, Claire. Clarie is 7 years old and already very experienced in the arena of LOVE and HEARTBREAK.

A few nights ago we were talking and she told me of a recent tragedy in her short little life.

Claire: "Aunt Debbie, did you know that I broke up with my boyfriend?"
Me: "No, Claire. I didn't even know that you had a boyfriend!"

Clarie: "Yeah, his name is Tyler. He was my boyfriend. But I broke up with him."

Me: "Oh. You broke up with him. How long were you "going out"?"

Claire: "We were going out a long time. But he made me mad."

Me: "What did he do?"

Claire: "He was mean to Germy (Jeremy mispronounced). They were fighting so I broke up with him. Germy says that he will play with me even though I want to marry him when I grow up. But I still love Tyler and I forgive him."
Me: "So Claire, you want to marry Jeremy but you love Tyler?"
Claire: "Yup!"
Ahhh-the joys of young love!

THE GREAT EGGSTRAVAGANZA EGG DROP



The Kane Cousins held the First Annual Eggstravaganza Egg Drop.

Brittanie organized the drop by emailing everyone the requirements for what materials were allowed to be used. Everyone made a "nest" for their egg and then took turns dropping them from a height of about 15 feet. We had only 1 winner and that
was... JOSH! But I believe that I heard that he may have used too many rubberbands which may disqualify him! We did award him the prize, however, which was a cool water gun!
The competors were Tasha, Eli, Doran, Anna, Katie, and Josh

Monday, April 20, 2009

RUN FOREST, RUN!

Last Saturday was the Big Race! The SLC Marathon of which I ran the 1/2 Marathon.
My niece, Tory, ran the 1/2 as well. But the real HERO was my sister, Meg. She ran the 5k. I am really proud of her! She's amazing!
I only ran it to get the medal! I was so happy that I finished in just under 2 1/2 hours!
It may look HOT, but it was about 43 degrees at the start of the race and about 54 when this photo was taken! Jade was awesome! He followed me all along the race route. He said he wanted to take pictures, but I really think it was because he thought I'd collapse and wanted to be sure I had medical attention!
My cute, 17 year old niece! We both started the 1/2 marathon together. I ran with her for all of 60 seconds! She looked over her shoulder and took off, leaving me panting! She finished the race in less than 2 hours! While I spent the remainder of the day in bed, she was off with friends and was at the Prom that night!

Obviously this is in the BEGINNING of the race because I am still smiling.

We celebrated at Goodwoods that night with 3 of our favorite people, Britt, Michael and ABBY!

HOW CUTE IS SHE!!! (I'm referring to Abby!)